There are several key factors that enable you to get a relationship back after you’ve broken up with an ex-partner.
One of them is that you have a good guide or mentor — and usually we would think of that is being a couples’ counsellor or therapist. However there is another approach, which is to use an Internet program designed by somebody like Michael Fiore, a man who was got wide experience over many years in building relationship programs.
His programs will enable you to achieve greater success in your relationship and hopefully restore harmony and affection where it has been destroyed by a breakup.
Now there are several key factors that need to be in evidence for any program to be successful in this way.
First of all, you need to be still in love with your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend, and you really want them back more than anything else in the world.
Because that mustn’t be because you just want them back simply to boost your own ego to make yourself feel like a man.
It actually means that you must want them back for a the purpose of rebuilding a genuine relationship with them on a new basis.
Your old relationship diet is very good reasons — brolly arguments and bad feeling — and now you’re going to rebuild a relationship on the basis of love.
That means that you must be prepared to change, and that you must be ready to except that you are part of the problem in causing the relationship break in the first place.
Now what in practice does that mean: where these are you’re going to a separation, and you’re scared that you could lose the person who you really love forever.
It means that you are afraid of losing your ex-partner to somebody else, and you are worried that they may find somebody better than you. And finally, it probably means that you aren’t actually getting much response from them if you are approaching them to establish a reconciliation.
But the truth of the matter is that there are things to do before you get down to reconciliation.
So to start with, as Michael Fiore says, the first thing you have to do is basically have a 30 day separation from any contact with your ex-partner. The object of this is to enable you to work on yourself, and establish also some key factors: why you broke up in the first place, and why you want them back, being amongst the most important.
Second, having said this you need to establish that you are genuinely interested in their welfare as well is your own.
Relationship psychology is a very subtle and cunning thing. It creeps up on you in a way that you would least expect, usually with a feeling of loss that seems unbearable.
As any relationship expert will tell you, the breakup of a relationship can be so painful that it seems to be life threatening.
First of all your experience denial, refusing perhaps to believe that the relationship is ending, or not simply be able to accept the pain of how loved and trusted partner suddenly care so little about you or your feelings.
And now having excepted it, you’ll find that you move into place of grief and despair, where you feel sad, and lonely, and you certainly will cry a lot.
There may be an intense need to make contact with your ex-partner — hence all those misguided text messages sent from the pub after a few drinks.
And then you will probably find that you’re feeling extremely fearful about the prospect of life without your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. No wonder the text messages go out at this point! But the wrong kind of text messages can be replaced by simply texting back your ex partner.
Those texts sent from the pub are always the wrong kind of text message. They’re not the kind of text messages going to engage your partner or make them want to be near you. The truth of the matter is that unless you know how to get over your anger, you’re never going to present an attractive face to your ex-partner.
And indeed, these are only some of the emotions that you may feel — you may feel self blame and guilt, you may feel jealousy, you may feel confusion, and you may even feel relief if you genuinely didn’t want to be in the relationship.
With so much at stake, is it any wonder that programs advertised as “relationship healers” like Text Your Ex Back, are so popular and sell so well?
Of course you have several alternatives: you can seek support from friends and family, you can take steps to closure in your relationship, you could find new and different things to do with your time and your life, and you could see a psychologist.
But not all of these will work if you actually still want to be in a relationship, and if you still want to have love and affection shared with your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend.
If that’s the case, and you genuinely feel that is the right relationship for you, then may I suggest that you have a look at text your ex back by Mike Fiore. He is the author of other programs which proved extremely successful and very relevant people broken up or are in relationships that are failing, and in particular he’s written a program called Text The Romance Back which demonstrates his intimate knowledge of one-to-one relationships.